Ouch!

It's amazing how God really just grabs my attention sometimes.

The other day I was doing my quiet time...okay, okay...half-heartedly doing my quiet time. For that day, it had almost become a 'check the box' on the to-do list.

I was reading along in Mark 16 where Christ's death is depicted. Christ says, "Eloi, Eloi, lama sabachthani?" (My God, My God, why have You forsaken Me?) Even as I was reading it my heart wasn't in the right place. I was thinking that I've read this a million times before (okay, maybe that's an exaggeration)...it's even underlined with notes in my Bible. As I went back to my devotional, it discussed how every stripe on Christ's back, every nail, everything He endured on the cross was because of my sin. In my head, I was thinking 'but I know this.' The devotion continued on with the question of 'would I really have deserved this punishment' and the answer that according to the Word I do. But what hit home was the next line

And if we really think about it, as well intentioned as we assume we are, we can all recall times that we have shunned the personality of the Holy for something that utterly violated it...ON PURPOSE.

What??? On purpose???!!! My heart sank...and my entire attitude changed immediately changed. I won't go into the rest of my quiet time that day or what else I'm studying, but I am thankful that God is faithful. He loves me so much that He desires to humble me so that I will remember that time with Him is not something to be checked off each day, but it is a time of worship. It is a time for Him to teach me. It is a time where a daughter can just rest in the arms of her Father and remember the grace He lavishes upon her.

My heart leaps!

I first heard about Mercy Ships in 2002. A girl in my singles' class in Dallas served aboard Mercy Africa for a month. Hearing about her experience and seeing her pictures really moved me. Over the years, I've had applications several times. I've even completed the application once, but didn't mail it. Something has always prevented me from going...time...money...commitments. And yet, it comes back. I hear of others who have served or Mercy Ships is mentioned during the sermon at church...and my heart leaps. I am still moved the same way I was the first time I heard. Providing healing and hope...physically and spiritually.

I hear Mercy Ships...and my heart leaps.

Really???!!!

I've been contemplating getting a new car. My car is paid off, which is nice, but I know that it's not going to last forever and I've been having to put more money than I'd like into it's up-keep...not so much that it's like making a car payment every month, but I don't want to get there. Anyway, I decided to check the Blue Book value of my car with the high mileage and everything...accounting for it's "good" (but not excellent) condition. My car is listed at around $6500...seriously???. I only paid $13,000 brand new and my car has 106,000 miles on it. I think something must be wrong.

This is my cousin!

More randomness!

I've finished painting my bedroom, bathroom, and kitchen.

Miss Kitty is in love with a new blanket I got for my bed. It's kind of furry.

I only have one Christmas gift left to buy, but I have three birthday presents to find.

All of my immediate family members have birthdays within one month of each other.

I'm on vacation, but I haven't been able to sleep later than 8 AM.

My apartment smells like brownies.

I'm trying to decide between two colors for my dining room - Scottish Loch and Victorian Garnet...I think I'm going with February Gold for the living room.

I found a new project I want to be involved with in the new year.

I feel like entertaining, but my apartment is not yet ready for visitors...someday soon!

Greatness!

I've found a new shampoo. It smells fantastic and my hair looks "brilliant!"

Random

I've had a tall nonfat peppermint mocha hold the whip every day this week. Thank you, Starbucks!

My snapdragons are still blooming.

My amaryllis is growing and should be blooming in a few weeks.

Miss Kitty sleeps a lot.

I've already studied for several hours today, and I still have several hours more to go.

Sometimes an unexpected page makes your day.

Having your attending tell you that your pants are falling down is really embarrassing.

It's nice when your attending buys the team coffee.

My vacation officially starts at 11:30 tomorrow morning.

I really want cookies and milk right now, so I'm going to end this post and whip some up.

By the way...

I should not have had the tall nonfat peppermint mocha at 6:30 this evening. It was delicious and in a red cup, but I am still wired.

I needed a hug.

I've had 5 or 6 really difficult days in the past three weeks. Patients have died or taken a turn for the worse. I've had to have difficult conversations with parents or had to deal with situations that I didn't realize God had prepared me to handle.

While I'm at work, I compartmentalize. I can't get too caught up in the emotional side because there's work to be done and I have to be what the families need me to be. I have to be calm. I have to be able to give information as well as take information during the difficult times. But each day, I came home and just really needed a hug. I needed a reminder of God's love for me. Yes, I can open up the Bible and read about His love but at each of those moments, I needed to feel it.

I didn't ever get those hugs. Miss Kitty might be a cuddler, but she's definitely not a hugger.

Last night at church, I finally got a hug. One of the girls in my class came up to me and gave me a real hug (as opposed to the side hug). I told her thanks and that I needed that, so she hugged me again. She didn't ask me why...she just loved me. She showed me God's love. It was the first real hug I had been given in over three weeks, and it was exactly what I needed.

Lord, thank you for providing again.

Some people really love their dogs.

I went running at Memorial Park this morning with a large percentage of other Houstonians. There were lots of people running with their dogs and plenty of women running with jogging strollers. Then just as I passed one of the strollers, I looked back to see the cute baby...and what to my wondering eyes should appear...two fluffy white dogs. Yep, the lady was pushing her two little white dogs in a stroller while running. Seriously!